Mother Love

Mother Love
so miserable
so in need of reassurance of my value as a human being
someone please tell me i am loved~
embarrassed by my own need but needing just the same
my mind opens to the presence of my mother and she is here
and i can step into the scene as she sits in the winged back chair, and
i say oh please tell me what you would tell me if i could sit on your lap right now
i'm not heavy just big—i can pull up my legs and hug them to my chest with
chin resting on bony knees as i pretend or float into dream or am held
in the reality of mother love~
i need to hear, and she knows this,
i love you
i ask why
you are loveable, she says while holding me
there in the alcove of my single woman's apartment
i close my eyes and imagine her saying
exactly this:

I love you more than
        January chimes
        love the frigid Sunday noon.
I love you more than
       a February sparrow
        loves the seed cast upon the snow.
I love you more than
        a March breeze
        loves the kites above the trees.
I love you more than
        the April boy
        loves the Ump’s first "Play Ball."
I love you more than
        the May spaniel
        loves the springing bunny chase.
I love you more than
       a June kitten
       loves the fly in the lampshade.
I love you more than
        July hot fudge
        loves cold vanilla ice cream.
I love you more than
        the August bride
        loves the kiss of her groom.
I love you more than
       the September dust
       loves a good shower.
I love you more than
        the full October moon
        loves a clear and star full night.
I love you more than
        the old November woman
        loves the radiator’s morning clanks.
I love you more than
        the noses of December
        love the smell of pre-snow night air.